Behind the Scenes
by shinyklefkey
Summary: The adventures and mishaps of the actors of the Shingeki no Kyojin anime when they're off the set. An actor-AU.
1. To You Two Thousands Years Later

A/N: Hello there! If you don't already know, I'm the author of Texts From the Survey Corps. I've decided to make a side-project that focuses on the actor AU of Shingeki no Kyojin. What are the actors doing when they're not filming? What kind of mischief and troubles do they get into? I'll be basing each chapter on an episode, so I definitely won't be covering everything, just the scenes I want to focus on.

Also, if they were actors they would obviously have different names, but since creating new names for them would be kind of awkward, I'll just call them according to their character that they play.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Chapter 1: To You Two Thousand Years Later<strong>

A small boy was lying near a large tree, surrounded by lush green hills and vivid violets. He suddenly gasped as his eyelids fluttered open, revealing stunning turquoise eyes the colour of the ocean. His eyes remained wide open as the boy tried to catch his breath. The cool wind was blowing his dark brown locks astray. As his vision began to focus, he noticed a girl in a worn pink cardigan and red scarf leaning over him. Her long black hair was flowing in the wind as well, but the boy was focused more on her grey eyes that flickered with - was it concern?

"Huh, Mikasa?" the boy murmured, still in a daze.

"We should head back," Mikasa said. She was still leaning over him, her steely eyes now unreadable.

"Why...are you here?"

She rolled her eyes and stood up. "You were sleeping, weren't you?" she scoffed. "Still think you're dreaming?"

"No...I think I was just having a really long dream." He sat up and folded his arms on his knees, trying to collect himself. For some reason, he was still breathing heavily, as if he had just run a marathon.

"What was I dreaming about?" The boy began rubbing his head in frustration. "I can't remember..."

He heard a clatter and turned to see Mikasa carrying a decent-sized wood pile on her back. She looked at him, and started in surprise.

"Eren, why are you crying?"

"Huh?" He immediately put his hand to his face, and sure enough, there were small tears in the corners of his eyes.

* * *

><p>"And...cut! Good job, Eren and Mikasa! You two were excellent! Hour-break for lunch!"<p>

Eren sighed in relief, quickly wiping the tears from his eyes.

"Not bad, Eren," the girl said as she helped him onto his feet. "How'd you do that? It's so hard for me to cry on the spot."

The boy grinned wickedly as he pulled out an eye dropper from his pants pocket and put it up to her face. "One of the adult actors gave it to me. He said it worked wonders when he was trying to pick up girls!"

Mikasa lightly slapped the bottle away from her face, rolling her eyes in exasperation. "Typical. Don't tell me you want to be just like him?"

"What's wrong with that? He's so cool and awesome!"

"Whatever you say, Eren. Come on," she said, pulling Eren away from the set, "let's go eat lunch with Armin before our break's over!"

The two kids began running toward their target, an extremely long table filled with gourmet sandwiches and quiches.

"YEAH, FOOD!" Eren hollered as he and Mikasa dodged and circumvented the adults milling around the table. He was only an arm's reach away from the treasure when he felt his feet leave the ground. Eren tried to speed up, but he realized that he was being held by the collar of his rough brown shirt.

"No! Mika's going to get more food than me!" he squealed. "Let me go!" He suddenly felt a punch to his arm. "Ow, what gives?"

"Your face," Mikasa deadpanned, retracting her arm before she could get hit by Eren's flailing limbs. "Does it look like I'm getting food as well?" The girl was suspended in midair like a string puppet. "Hannes, let us go! We're hungry!"

Eren hadn't even noticed the man holding the two kids in the air like rag dolls. The blonde hair laughed wholeheartedly.

"Aw, you guys are hilarious. Eren, you should've seen yourself when you were trying to run away. You looked like the Road Runner!" He continued to chortle. Suddenly, Hannes' laugh stopped short, and he gasped in pain as he let Eren and Mikasa down from their air prisons.

"Armin! I can't believe you punched me!" Hannes wheezed, rubbing his stomach gingerly.

"Right in the gut! And that's what you get for capturing my friends!" the small blonde boy yelled, raising his right fist in victory. "Let's go guys! Charge!"

And the three kids began yelling again as they grabbed as many sandwiches and quiches as they could gather in their arms.

"Well, that was fun," Hannes commented as he tenderly rubbed the spot where Armin had put a right hook to.

"Right?" a wry, baritone voice replied. A man with slicked-back blonde hair stood alongside Hannes, watching Eren, Mikasa and Armin flee with half the table's food in their arms and shirts. "I see Armin's right hook is getting better."

Hannes glared at the tall, well-built man. "Goddamn it. You've been teaching him, haven't you Erwin?"

"He's a great pupil. Learns quickly too," Erwin said, smiling as he thought of the feisty little kid who was quite different from Armin the character.

"Trying to make a mini-you, is that what you're trying to do?" the older man grumbled as he trudged to the food table. "Last thing we need is another Erwin Smith roaming the Earth."

"What's wrong with that?"

"Everything."

* * *

><p>"Mmm! This is so good!" Eren said excitedly as he shoved a ham and cheese sandwich into his mouth.<p>

"Ew, Eren! Chew before you talk," Mikasa giggled, biting into a large quiche. "But you're right, they are delicious."

The blonde boy smiled as the two stuffed their mouths full. "Watch out before you guys get stomachaches from eating too fast."

"Says the one who's already eaten three full-size sandwiches," Mikasa retorted, sticking her tongue out at Armin.

"Hey, I was taking my time cause you guys were taking so long shooting the scene. I was bored!" Armin spread his arms up into the air, taking in the clear blue sky and the same meadow where the other two kids had filmed their scene. "What else is there to do?"

"Practice your lines," Eren suggested.

"I've memorized them already."

"Talk to the other adult actors."

"They're doing their own boring adult thing," Armin whined, stamping his foot. "The only fun thing I've had is getting combat lessons from Erwin Smith."

Eren and Mikasa gaped at the blonde, the half-chewed sandwich almost falling out of Eren's mouth.

"_The_ Erwin Smith? No way!" Mikasa exclaimed incredulously.

"Believe it, Mika. I bet if I was Armin instead of Armout in the anime, I could beat those bullies up like flies!" he bragged. "I bet I even gave Hannes a bruise when I punched him in the gut."

Eren smirked as he took another bite of his sandwich. "I don't believe you."

Armin's eyes bugged out. "What? How could you not believe me?"

"You don't have any proof."

"You can look at Hannes' stomach as proof. I bet there's a black bruise there by now!"

"Pff," Eren scoffed, "anyone can punch Hannes in the gut."

"How about I punch _you_ in the gut?"

"Ha ha, you're so funny."

"Then what do I have to do to prove it to you?" the blonde begged, tears welling up in his eyes.

"Eren," Mikasa warned him, looking at him with stern eyes, "don't push it."

"I dare you to beat up the bullies in your scene."

"What the hell?" Mikasa looked back and forth between the two boys as they stared intensely at each other. "You guys are crazy. Don't do it, Armin. I believe you..."

Armin stood up, ignoring Mikasa, and collected the remainder of his lunch. "You'd better be watching then!" he called out as he headed back to the set.

"I'll be looking forward to it," Eren replied back. He went back to eating his sandwich as he watched Armin disappear from sight.

"Eren, you idiot!" Mikasa snapped, slapping his sandwich out of his hand. The boy stood up angrily in response.

"What's your problem, Mika? I was eating that!"

"My problem," she said, rising up to match Eren's height, "is that you hurt Armin's feelings."

"He was probably bluffing! Like a kid would get trained by the great Erwin Smith."

"But most importantly," Mikasa went on, ignoring Eren, "is that a bunch of unsuspecting kids are going to get beat up by Armin! You just sic'd him on those poor guys!"

The brunette gulped as he reconsidered what he had done. He had been hit by Armin's right hook before by accident, and it hadn't been pretty. The actors playing the bullies definitely didn't deserve that.

"Maybe you're right..."

"Of course I am, you twit!" Mikasa snapped. She tugged at his hand, like she had right before lunch. "Hurry up before he gets some damage done!"

"Alright, alright," Eren reassured her as they ran to find Armin. "If it's that scene, then it should be at the Shiganshina set."

"We have to be there in ten minutes anyway."

"Wait, what?"

"Don't you every pay attention, Eren?"

"Not really..."

Mikasa sighed, brushing her bangs out of her face. "I can't believe I have to take care of you two idiots," she muttered under her breath.

"Oh yeah? Then why are you friends with us?" Eren asked coyly, grinning wider as she spluttered.

"Shut up, idiot."

Eren laughed triumphantly. "Ha, I win!"

"Not if we don't stop Armin in time, you won't."

* * *

><p>After ten minutes of bickering and running around the set trying to find the right building, Eren and Mikasa finally came upon the director surrounded by the cameras and the crew.<p>

"Alright! Take one of scene four! And action!"

"Oh no!" Mikasa whispered urgently to Eren. "We're too late!" The two tried to stand on their tiptoes to see what was going on, but the people in the crew were blocking their view.

"Don't worry," the boy whispered back, "we'll make sure that it'll go okay. Come on, let's weave through these people and hopefully we'll make our way to Armin."

As the two kids began snaking their way through the crowd, they could hear snippets of the scene being filmed.

"What's wrong, heretic?" a mocking voice jeered. A laugh, then a grunt that could only belong to Armin as he was shoved haphazardly against the stone wall. "If you don't like it, hit back!"

Eren and Mikasa hurried their pace as they circled around the camera crew and behind the director's back.

Armin grunted again. "No way," he panted. "That would put me on your level!"

"What?!" the bully exclaimed, shock evident in his voice.

"You know what I said is true. That's why you're hitting me instead of arguing."

Eren and Mikasa were now in direct sight of Armin surrounded by three large teenagers. The bully with the spiky blonde hair was pushing Armin against the wall, and he was surrounded by a large-boned brunette and a slighter silver-haired guy with a wicked grimace. Even though Armin was being (unwillingly) manhandled by the bullies, he still had a fierce intense look in his blue eyes.

"Wow, great acting," Mikasa commented quietly to Eren. "He looks almost as angry as you do!"

"I'm not sure if that's meant to insult me or not," Eren muttered under his breath. "But yeah, he's doing really well right now. Which is why we've got to stop him from messing up!"

"Doesn't that you admit I won?" Armin fired back as the bully made a confused noise in the back of his throat. The three kids were taken aback with shock on their faces.

"Shut your damned mouth!" the blonde bully snapped back as he prepared to land a punch on Armin.

"Oh crap, he's going to do it," Mikasa muttered as Armin began to snap back his arm to right hook the poor guy.

"STOP IT!" Eren cried as he sprinted towards the four kids, Mikasa following closely behind with a grim look on her face.

"Huh? It's Eren!" the bully said, squinting at the rapidly approaching boy. "What's he doing here?"

"GAHHHHHH!" Eren screamed. The three actors playing the bullies slowly backed away warily.

"What the hell?" the grey-haired bully shrieked. "Don't attack us!" The three actors wrapped their heads around their arms and braced themselves...as Eren sailed past them and tackled Armin to the ground, sending a cloud of dirt and dust into the air.

"Ow, Eren! What gives?" Armin snapped as he tried to throw Eren off of him, to no avail. "I was going to prove it to you!"

"You don't need to prove anything to me!" Eren yelled back as he forced the blonde boy's arms behind his back. He then quieted down as Armin stopped struggling against his arm lock. "I already know you're a strong fighter. That's not proving that you've been training under Erwin."

"And that doesn't mean you should take it out on those poor saps," Mikasa said as she walked up to the two boys. "Look at them, you scared that guy to tears." She pointed to the large brown-haired bully who still had a shocked expression on his face, albeit with watery eyes that looked like they were going to overflow.

Armin glanced at them before looking down sadly. "Oh...I guess you're right. I'd feel awful if I actually hurt those guys." He looked up at his two friends and smiled sadly. "Thanks for stopping me, guys."

"No problem. Anything to help my friend." Eren grinned back.

"Great...can you get off me now? You're getting my clothes dirty."

The brunette laughed as he brushed dirt off his palms and got up with Mikasa's help. "Sorry about that. I didn't mean to actually knock you to the ground."

"It's alright. I deserved it anyway," the blonde replied as Eren helped him to his feet.

Eren was about to respond, but he was interrupted by the director as he marched up to the three kids.

"What do you think you two are doing? You're not supposed to be in this scene!" the director exclaimed, waving his script around erratically.

Eren and Mikasa squirmed under the director's gaze. "Director," Armin began, stepping in between his two friends and the director, "it was my fault. I told them to come onto the set because I thought it would make the scene really exciting and interesting. I mean, it is just a scene of me being beat up by a bunch of bullies. It sounds much more captivating if Eren and Mikasa come to my rescue, don't you think?"

The director scrunched his eyebrows as he massaged his invisible goatee. Armin, Eren and Mikasa glanced nervously at each other as each tension-filled second passed.

"That...is a GREAT IDEA!" the director exclaimed, eyes brimming with manic glee. "Why didn't I think of that? We could have Eren come in, with the bullies getting ready to beat the crap out of him until Mikasa comes in! Then they'd all run away!"

Eren pumped his fist in excitement. "Yeah! Wait...I'm not the one scaring them?"

"Sweet!" Mikasa squealed happily. She began dancing around in circles. "I get to own everyone!"

"That's not fair!" Eren pouted. "I want to be the big bad hero!"

"Just be glad the director's not yelling at you for cutting into the scene," Armin whispered into Eren's ear.

He sighed. "I suppose...and thanks for saving us from the director's wrath, Armin. That was some pretty impressive persuading."

"What are friends for?" Armin smiled as his arm looped around Eren's shoulder.

Their touching moment only lasted for a couple seconds though, as the director resumed his duties and began ordering everyone to prepare for the second take of the scene.

"Okay, we've wasted enough time as is! Time to start take 2 of scene 4! And...ACTION!"

* * *

><p><span><strong>Bloopers<strong>

Eren: Huh? Are you going somewhere Dad? Work?

Grisha: Yes, I'm going inland to see patients. Probably for five or six years. You guys will be fine on your own.

Eren: ...

Grisha: Ha, I just spoiled the entire episode, didn't I?


	2. That Day

A/N: Hello again! I know it's been a while, so I've decided to update before school starts again. Again, this is an actor AU, so the characters have different personalities, varying from almost identical to the complete opposite.

Don't worry, the older characters will appear in the next chapter! But to appease you guys, I've already introduced one of them in this chapter. Guess who? ;)

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><p><span><strong>Chapter 2: That Day<strong>

"What time is it?"

"Time for you to get a watch."

"I'm pretty sure people back then didn't have watches. At least that's what the director says."

"Get a compass then."

"I think you mean a sundial..."

"Geez Eren, stop being such a know-it-all."

"It's common knowledge, Armin!"

"Can you two shut up for a second?" Mikasa snapped.

The three children were sitting in their usual spot, at the meadow underneath the giant tree. Mikasa was looking at her script and was sitting in between Eren and Armin, who had just finished lunch and were laying on the grass, staring at the cloudless sky.

The two boys became silent, but a second later...

"Well Eren, you and your 'common knowledge' can go-"

Mikasa slammed down her script in annoyance. "Didn't I tell you guys to shut your mouths?"

"Only for a second," Eren quipped. "Which is exactly what we did."

"You need to be more specific," Armin replied back. He and Eren shared a high five while Mikasa buried her head between her legs and muttered incomprehensible words.

Armin leaned in towards Mikasa, who was unfortunately seated between the two boys.

"Did I hear you say 'actually impossible'? That's not very nice."

Mikasa threw her hands up in the air. "I give up. You two idiots can go figure out the schedule yourselves, be late for everything and get the director mad at you." She stood up, brushing the grass off her legs before setting off for an unknown destination.

"Wait," Eren called out, "where are you going? You know we're just kidding around!"

"Let's see how 'kidding around' gets you when you don't even know when and where the next scene is!" Mikasa yelled back. She began sprinting away from the two boys towards the staff tents.

Eren and Armin shared a look with each other before scrambling up from the ground. They relied entirely on Mikasa for their schedule, since she was the only one well-prepared (and willing) to carry around the package of papers all day.

"Wait for us, Mika!" The two boys reached the staff area and scurried between the tents looking for Mikasa. But she had disappeared without a trace.

"We're sorry!" Armin called out.

Eren joined in. "Please forgive us! I know Armin's a douche, but-"

"What do you mean, I'm a douche?"

"Well, you are!"

"If I'm a douche, that makes you a super douche."

"Well then, you're the master douche!"

"Excuse me? Who's the one who thinks he's such a know-it-all with your 'common knowledge'?"

"That has nothing to do with being a douche!"

"Yes it does!"

"Do you even know what douche means?"

"Of course I do! It's another name for Eren Jaeger!"

"You asshole!"

Armin gasped in horror. "You just said a bad word! I'm telling!"

Eren scoffed. "On who?"

"On - EEEEK!"

Eren was about to make fun of Armin's squealing, but he quickly joined in as freezing ice water was dumped over their heads.

"Oh my God! It's so cold!" Armin screamed, wrapping his arms around his drenched clothes.

"Who - even?" Eren's teeth were chattering as he desperately tried to warm himself up.

"Serves you right!" a voice above their heads called out.

Eren and Armin peered up on the roof of the tent. Mikasa's head poked out over the canvas, and she stuck her tongue out before unceremoniously dumping another bucket of water on her friends.

"What - the - hell!" Eren sputtered. "Stop it!"

"Not unless you apologize for being smartasses."

"Bad word!" Armin pointed at Mikasa accusingly.

"So? I know you were going to say an even worse word before I interrupted you."

Armin opened his mouth to reply. "Don't even," Mikasa warned with a dangerous glint in her grey eyes. "Say sorry or else you'll be getting another bucketful of water." She dragged out another bucket from behind her and began swaying it dangerously over their heads.

"How many does she even have?" Eren muttered to Armin under his breath.

"I don't even know..." Armin whimpered back.

"I'm waiting..."

Eren and Armin looked at each other fearfully. They had heard that voice before. And it didn't end pleasantly.

"We're very sorry," the two boys said in unison.

"For what?" Eren could feel a couple water droplets land on his shoulder.

"For being a smartass." "For messing with you," Armin and Eren replied at the same time.

Mikasa pondered their forced apology for a moment before nodding and lifting the bucket back onto the tent. "Okay then. You guys are forgiven. The bucket's getting pretty heavy anyway."

The two boys sighed in relief. Potential disaster averted.

"But can you help me get down from here?"

Armin cocked his eyebrow in confusion. "Eh? How did you get up there in the first place?"

"There was a ladder, but while I was dumping water on you guys, someone must have taken the ladder cause it's gone now," Mikasa said sheepishly.

Armin smacked his forehead. "Miss Smarty Pants is stuck on the tent and needs our help," Eren chortled.

"Quit it!" Mikasa snapped. "I still have my bucket of water."

"Only one," Eren shot back.

"And you guys could always just move away, since your friend is stuck in that one spot."

Eren, Armin and Mikasa turned their heads towards their new visitor. A lanky guy with ash blonde hair stood a few feet away from them, his hands stuffed into his grey hoodie worn over his military uniform.

Eren immediately recognized the teenager. "Muffin Top!" he yelled as he ran up to the blonde. "Have you been spying on us?"

The guy's eye twitched at his nickname. "Oi, how many times have I told you that it's Jean?" He ruffled Eren's hair. "I came to see what all the commotion was about, since you guys are so fricking loud. And what's she doing up there?" He gestured towards the stranded girl.

"Mika was dumb enough to get stuck on the roof without a way down," Armin jeered.

"I told you, someone took the ladder!" Mikasa snapped back angrily.

"Alright, calm down. You guys are actually worse than your older counterparts, if that's even possible," Jean grumbled. He scratched his head, pondering for a moment before nodding. He held out his arms towards Mikasa. "Jump."

"What?" Mikasa's face turned bright red. "No way! What if you miss?"

Jean rolled his eyes. "Like I would miss. You're literally jumping a foot down. And I promise to catch you."

"But-"

"Do you want to stay there all day or not?"

Mikasa stared at Jean's outstretched arms, pursing her lips. A couple seconds passed, and just as Jean thought it was hopeless, Mikasa sighed as she positioned herself towards the edge of the tent. "Fine. But if I get injured somehow, you're paying my bills."

Jean smirked. "Typical American."

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

The girl sighed, and jumped. Less than a second later, Jean caught her easily and brought her safely down to the ground.

"Thanks, I guess," Mikasa mumbled under her breath.

"Thanks for sounding so grateful. By the way, try not to climb any more tents in the future. Your sister is going to go nuts if she finds out. And she'll have my head along with yours."

Mikasa paled at the reference to her sister. "Got it."

"Alright then." Jean stretched his arms. "Nice seeing you guys. Stay out of trouble, Mika, promise?" He held out a hand to the girl.

"O-okay," Mikasa stammered as she pinky-promised Jean.

"Cool. You too, Eren. Don't forget to go to the Shiganshina set!" Jean called back as he began walking away from the trio.

Eren watched Jean's retreating figure. He looked at Mikasa and raised his eyebrows.

"Are you blushing?"

Mikasa's eyes widened. "What? Of course not!" she growled, but she covered her face with her red scarf.

"You are!" Armin exclaimed. "Someone has a crush on Muffin Top!"

"I do not! Take that back!"

"Never!"

Jean shook his head as he heard the kids he had just left yelling in the distance. He could almost hear his friends yelling in a similar fashion on the other side of the tents. Actually...he could hear them.

_"What do you think you're doing?"_

_"Eating a sandwich, what else?"_

_"You're eating MY sandwich."_

_"Well, it's mine now, bitch."_

_"Give it to me. I'm starving!"_

_"Could you two stop yelling in my ear?"_

_"Not until he gives my sandwich back!"_

Jean grimaced as his friends' voices grew louder and louder.

_More loud smartasses to deal with..._

* * *

><p>"Are you guys ready?"<p>

"Huh?" Eren yawned and opened his eyes. "Yeah, I guess so."

The director looked at him doubtfully. "Boy, stop looking so sleepy. You're supposed to be all angry and angsty and crying for your mom."

"No problem. Yawning makes my eyes water. I don't think I'll even need the eye droppers this time." Eren hopped off the chair and began heading toward the camera crew.

"Really, Eren?" Mikasa said, running to catch up with him. "You don't need to be so snarky all the time."

"But it's so fun!" Eren whined.

His friend sighed. "Just stick to your computer nerdiness."

Eren pouted. "Excuse you. My bro says computer science is where it's at."

"Like I care about silly zeros and ones and a whole bunch of random numbers."

"That's called binary code."

"Like I said, no one cares."

"Hurry up, kids!" Hannes yelled from the set. "You two are slower than my great-grandmother!"

Mikasa looked puzzled. "Wouldn't she be dead by now?"

"Exactly my point!" Hannes hollered back.

Eren and Mikasa made disgusted faces, and they ran up to Hannes.

"Alright," the blonde man said, "I'm supposed to be carrying you two like sacks of potatoes, so I apologize in advance if I accidentally drop you on the ground."

"Shouldn't you be stronger than that?" Mikasa questioned him. "I mean, we're only eleven."

Hannes scratched his chin. "I suppose so, but carrying eighty pounds on each arm is quite a task, especially at my age. Also, Eren?"

Eren looked up at the man. "Yeah?"

"Try not to kick or punch me too hard," Hannes said wryly. He flicked Eren's forehead, earning a yelp from the boy. "I don't want to be left with another bruise. Armin's already hit me enough as is."

Eren frowned in disappointment. "But I was really looking forward to that!"

"Try it, and I'll drop you."

"...fine. You win this round."

Hannes grinned. "Sounds like a plan."

* * *

><p>"Ow!" Eren winced as the nurse swiped an alcohol wipe across his scratched arms.<p>

"Sorry kid, but your cuts need to be disinfected," the nurse said briskly. He threw the wipe into the trash can, and grabbed a patch of gauze, medical tape, and a tube of ointment. "Who knows what kind of germs are on the ground."

At that moment Armin came running into the tent searching left and right for his friend. At last he found Eren and ran towards him, Mikasa following behind at a leisurely pace. "Eren! Are you alright?"

"I would be, if it wasn't for him!" Eren raised his arm, and hissed in pain as the air washed over his freshly disinfected cuts.

Armin and Mikasa looked over at where Eren was about to point, and saw Hannes sitting nearby holding an ice pack to his head.

Hannes raised his free arm in defense. "It was an accident, I swear!"

"How hard is it to throw me onto a mat?"

"I was dazed because you bopped me in the head harder than I expected. I'm expecting a mild concussion from your hit, Eren."

"Only mild?"

Armin looked bewildered. "Uh...what happened, exactly?"

"Mr. Big Shot here was supposed to throw me onto the mat, but he threw me _over_ the mat instead. And I ate dirt." Eren gestured toward his bloodied chin and limbs.

"I told you I was sorry."

"Sorry doesn't cut it!"

While Eren and Hannes were bickering, Mikasa poked Armin in the ribs. "The scene turned out really well though. Both of them were crying actual tears from the pain."

Eren overheard Mikasa and turned towards her. "But I was hurt!"

"At least you guys don't have to redo the scene again. I think you'd appreciate not having to be thrown onto the mat a dozen times."

Eren groaned. "Whatever. Just bring me back lunch."

Mikasa nodded. "Will do. And after, we can go to the training grounds set and watch the older actors."

Eren and Armin noticeably brightened up. "Yeah!"

* * *

><p>"We're here," Mikasa said to her friends as she directed them to the training grounds.<p>

Eren looked around. Everything was brown. The wooden cabins, the fences surrounding the lower training grounds, the dusty ground, even the military uniform jackets adorned by the 104th squad actors.

Eren looked at the older actors in awe. They looked so professional, standing and looking like actual soldiers. In front of the trainees were several higher ranked officers, one of whom was shouting.

"...We now begin the enlistment ceremony for the 104th Trainee Corps!" a bald man with deep sunken eyes was bellowing. "I am Keith Shadis, and I had the misfortune to be assigned to train you bastards. And I'm not here to welcome you at all!" Eren saw the bald man scanning the two hundred or so actors with a look of disdain. "Right now, you're mere cattle, fit for nothing but Titan food!"

"Wow," Armin whispered to Eren and Mikasa, "he's really good."

"I know, right?" Mikasa whispered back. "Keith Shadis is such a great actor. He seems really scary, but he's actually really nice once you get to know him. At least that's what my sister says."

"I dunno," Eren said, looking at the angry man, "he looks scary, period."

"Hey look!" Armin pointed at one of the actors in the formation. "I see Muffin Top!"

Eren narrowed his eyes, and sure enough, Eren's mentor was standing between a tall boy with black hair and freckles, and a dirty blonde girl with glasses. Jean had a smug arrogant look on his face that Eren only ever saw when he was in character.

"Armin, I see your doppelgänger!" Mikasa gestured towards a short blonde boy with the same bowl cut as Armin. The two boys looked almost identical, even though they weren't related at all.

"Ha, he looks weak!" Armin sneered. "I bet if we had a fight I would win easily!"

Eren snorted as he adjusted the gauze on his elbow. "Yeah, right."

"But I beat up Hannes!"

"He purposely lost to you, Armin," Mikasa said nonchalantly. Before Armin could retaliate, Mikasa quickly said, "I see my sister."

Eren leaned over the fence and quickly spotted her sister's distinct Japanese features among the sea of European faces. She looked identical to her little sister, albeit with longer hair and a deadly calculating look in her eyes.

"I think she's scarier than Keith Shadis," Eren said aloud. He clapped his mouth shut when he realized what he said.

Mikasa giggled. "It's okay. I think she's scarier too. You should have seen her when Big Armin tried to steal her food."

"What about that guy?" Armin pointed to a brunette near the front of the formation. "He looks like he's going to murder someone!"

Eren immediately burst into laughter without even looking at where Armin was pointing. "That must be my brother. He's playing the older Eren, who's probably a hundred times angrier than my Eren."

They suddenly became quiet. Then Armin spoke. "I wonder if they're like us."

Eren thought it over. "Probably, but a lot more mature, since they're older than us."

"Hey, want to see if we can steal more cupcakes?"

"Let's do it!"

And the three children ran off leaving behind the now chaotic scene in the training grounds.

"And cut! I swear, if you and Ackerman goof off one more time, you guys are going to clean up the entire set by yourselves!"

"It was her fault, director!"

"He almost tripped me!"

"I don't care whose fucking fault it is! You're disrupting the entire filming!"

"But-"

"No buts!"

Meanwhile, Jean groaned inwardly as the bickering continued.

_Can't they take a break for a minute?_

* * *

><p><span><strong>Bloopers<strong>

**Shadis:** We now begin the enlistment ceremony for the 104th Trainee Corps! I am Nick Fury, and I have the misfortune to be assigned to train you SHIELD agents. And I'm not here to welcome you at all! Right now, you're mere cattle, fit for nothing but to serve as cattle for Loki! No, less than cattle...In three years, we'll take you worthless pieces of crap and train you! Give you the means to fight Hydra. In three years, when you stand before a Hydra agent, will you still be cattle? Or will you be a noble wall, shielding SHIELD? Or perhaps...oh my God. Shielding SHIELD?

**Jean:** I call Iron Man!

**Mikasa:** Dibs on Black Widow.

**Sasha:** I get to be Hawkeye!

**Reiner:** Captain America.

**Eren:** Yes...that's what I'll be. Wait...what am I supposed to be?

**Reiner:** You can be the Hulk.

**Armin:** Can I be Agent Hill then?

**Bertholdt:** ...Bucky Barnes.

**Reiner:** Can you not...


End file.
